Feed Me!

We bought a pitcher plant (that's Nepenthes Burbidgeae to you) a few months ago at a street fair and put it out on our terrace. It's a carnivorous plant that attracts insects into its hanging, pitcher-shaped cups of death, where they drown and are slowly dissolved into food. The woman at the street fair has been growing and selling several types of carnivorous plants for years, which I assumed were imported from Southeast Asia. Nope, they come from Alabama. Now THAT'S exotic!

It was a small little thing when we bought it, and didn't grow much for a few months. Then Ziggy learned that ants fall into the pitchers after a rain, because the surface of the plant gets all slippery on the outside and sticky on the inside. So she started spraying water on the pitchers regularly, and delighted in watching ants fall to their watery grave inside the plant. She liked this a lot. And so did the plant. This thing is now starting to resemble the star of Little Shop of Horrors, as Ziggy obsessively tends to its care, fueling its gluttony for...ant flesh.

But she apparently isn't the only one obsessed with these carnivorous vegetables; here's a flesh-eating plant montage that somebody posted on You Tube:

Mid-North Coast Region

Took a week off and drove to Port Macquarie and Coff's Harbour in the Mid-North Coast region of New South Wales. Really a beautiful area with a pristine coastline, long empty beaches and awesome ancient rainforests. Plus, on a purely hedonistic level, lots o' wineries and fresh oysters!



Our favorite areas were Bellingen and Dorrigo which are on the scenic "Waterfall Way" road. Bellingen is a small, authentically-funky town on the river and a place you can imagine moving to, getting into woodworking and setting up a silk screening studio in your old brightly-painted barn. (Note to self: learn woodworking and silk-screening.)


Dorrigo is at the top of a high plain which took about 30 minutes driving on a very twisty mountain road. Making it worthwhile was the even funkier, even smaller town itself and also the Dorrigo Rainforest. It's said to be one of the oldest remaining rainforests in the world, dating to when Australia was part of Gondwana, the ancient "supercontinent." Apparently, the big news of that afternoon was seeing a python knock a possum out of a tree and eat it whole. Luckier were the many "Bush Turkeys" we saw along the trail. I'm talking Aussie turkeys, not the soon-to-be-ex-Commander-In-Thief.


"Bush Turkeys" -- U.S. and Aussie versions:










Happy Thanksgiving!

Koalas are NOT bears, Dammit!

A typical exchange at the beautiful Taronga Zoo in Sydney:

AMERICAN: Those cuddly Koala Bears sure are so cute!

AUSSIE: KOALAS ARE NOT BEARS, DAMMIT!

Yes, Australians get a little touchy on this topic, and rightly so. Of course, this American would never make that mistake, as I'm keenly aware that koalas are actually "thickset arboreal marsupial herbivore" or, in Latin, Phascolarctos cinereus.

But, by whatever name, the little guys are as cute as just about anything on the planet. And endangered, of course. Their numbers are dwindling in Australia, due to habitat loss, cats and dogs, and many end up as roadkill. There are some great groups who rescue injured ones and work to keep them a central part of the Aussie landscape. In fact, our friends Katina & Will just visited Australia and saw a awesome koala and, of course, it was a highlight of their trip (other than seeing us)!

So, as a special Xmas offer, if you make a small contribution to the Australian Koala Foundation, I'll then show you some hot koala action.

Australian Koala Foundation









OK, now don't you feel better? Now enjoy this guilt-free koala porn!!

Sculpture by the Sea

Sculpture by the Sea is a tres' cool annual event along the seashore, stretching from Bondi Beach to Tamarama. There's all sorts of fun & funky sculptures installed for 2 weeks on the beach, in the water, and on the headlands. The quality of the work is quite high and, as always, we're continually impressed with the overall quality of the visual arts in Australia.

See Sculpture by the Sea

Attack of the Flesh-Eating Birds!

One of our favorite birds in Australia is the kookaburra.

It is often referred to as the "laughing kookaburra" because it has this loud, outrageous call that sounds like a drunken jackass...on crack. When you hear it, you feel like you are lost in the deepest jungle; in fact, the kookaburra's call has been used by Hollywood sound effects wizards since the days of Tarzan movies.

This is what it sounds like.

It's small but surprisingly stout & sturdy, and really cute.

Cute, that is, unless it eats you. This bird will only eat fresh meat, such as fish, snakes, lizards, rodents, and insects. It will also eat the small chicks of other birds. This little cutey pie is, in fact, a nasty cannibal!

When we were in Cairns recently, Ziggy tried feeding some nuts to this cute kookaburra who came onto our breakfast terrace. This bird has ZERO interest in nuts or fruits and wouldn't leave until the owner of the B&B brought out some raw beef...and lots of it.

It wolfed down a huge plate of beef and looked at us with this cute satisfied smile...or was it a bloodthirsty glint of hunger for human flesh...??

Springtime in OZ

September 1st is the first day of spring in Australia, and I suppose for the Southern Hemisphere. This will be our first spring and summer here so we're really looking forward to it! 

Sydneysiders complain how cold the winter was and, though it was longer than I expected, it was still pretty temperate...kind of what you'd find in LA.  

The best thing is that it is now fall -- and soon winter -- in NYC, so I can get back to gloating about the weather!

September 1st is also Wattle Day in Australia, wattles being the national floral emblem. Here's one kind of wattle:

I put together a little slide show of some OZ flowers and also a recent trip to Nimbin, which I guess is Hippie Central in Australia. The town still has a very chill vibe and doesn't seem to have changed much over the years -- thankfully!

Slide Show: Fab Flora of OZ

Straight to you from Atlantic City...

Not sure if it's part of a nostalgia circuit or what, but there's plenty of musical acts who appear in Sydney that I haven't heard about since...pre-Internet days. Recent/upcoming acts include Leo Sayer, Judas Priest, Olivia Newton-John & The Bangles:







Reminds me of when I visit Ohio and they're playing exactly the same songs as when I was a teen nerd, only now it's "Classic Rock." Journey or REO Speedwagon, anyone?

To be fair, there is some good live music to be found in Sydney, despite a reputation as a poor cultural second to Melbourne.

Plus, Australia does have Peter Garrett, former lead singer of Midnight Oil and now the Minister for the Environment, Heritage and the Arts. Although we had Joey Ramone on city council in NYC for a day...

In any event, isn't it about time that Steve Jobs (53) perfected a combination I-Pod/Hearing Aid?

Port Stephens

Visited beautiful Port Stephens recently, which is about a 3-hour drive up the coast from Sydney in New South Wales and just north of Newcastle. This is one of our favorite areas so far: tons of coastal waterways weaving in and out of the area, lots of nice beaches and one of the longest stretches of sand dunes outside of Saudi Arabia. As you can see from the photo, the port is guarded by two extinct volcanic cones, which is waycool unto itself.

The HUGE sand dunes extend for miles -- or kilometers, if you will. People take their 4WD all over the dunes, so you might be walking in the middle of sand, feeling all alone and peaceful, then suddenly a SUV comes barreling at you. Or an angry camel (but aren't they all?).

So off we went alone into the dunes, with Zig only a latte for sustenance. (She once carried tiramisu to the top of a mountain in Cali.) Once you get to the middle of endless sand dunes, what do you do after admiring them? We played frisbee.


We stayed at a fantastic B&B, The Batch , which is run by Lynn and Neil who are like your fave aunt and uncle, only cooler. They have a great little oasis there with lots of animals running around, including a resident koala, Jack.

Surprise, Jack sleeps a lot. The French Canadian guy who runs our local convenience store said it's because eucalyptus leaves contain alcohol. Here's Jack, drunk again:

Escape from Cockatoo Island

Been enjoying the Sydney Biennale and went out to Cockatoo Island in Sydney harbour last week. What a cooooooool place! It's a former shipyard and prison and the Biennale used the island for part of its exhibit. Sure, there was lots of yawn-inducing video art and the usual site-specific-installations made of Bush campaign buttons and monkey feces...but what is REALLY awesome is the island itself. If you like deserted post-industrial spaces like I do, this place is a mecca. Supposedly, they shot part of the X-Men Origins: Wolverine movie here and it sure feels that way.

The lower part of the island is the former shipyard, which closed in the late 1980's and all of the old buildings, huge cranes and equipment are still there, in silent and rusting tribute to Sydney's place in shipbuilding history. The upper part was the old convict prison yard from the 1800's and many of the buildings are still standing. The island is right in the middle of Sydney harbour and commands amazing views of the skyline and Harbour Bridge.

One thing I like about Australia is you can wander freely around a place like this without a lot of rent-a-cops, barricades, and the usual nanny-state safeguards that the U.S. would have. Sure, I could have easily gotten tetanus or stepped into a toxic waste sludge pool but -- hey -- that's part of the adventure. (Seriously, it's all cleaned up and quite safe. Though I do wonder why my toes suddenly got all....webby.)

They even have campgrounds out on the island with beautiful, modern BBQ and shower facilities. So the next time you want to go camping in a former prison and industrial shipyard site, you'll know where to go!

Lust, Caution...especially when downloading!

Having lived now in Tokyo, New York and Sydney, it's interesting to note what I'd call their true Techno Year, as in what year their technology and economies are really operating in:

Tokyo: 2020
New York: 2008
Sydney: 1989
(OK, I also used to live in Cincinnati: 1956.)

For instance, broadband internet connectivity in Australia is very 1989. It's slower, more unstable, and PRICEY. As opposed to the U.S., you pay per usage here. It can vary greatly -- from expensive to outrageous -- and one wonders how they can ever move into the 21st Century when you have to sweat each downloaded byte. The iPhone just launched here and, boy, it's gonna be costly to use. (Oh, yeah, Sydney just got TiVo too.)

Case in point: Optus wireless broadband, which is what we use for connectivity in Sydney. We have this cool white wireless modem that can be taken anywhere and -- as long as there's cell phone reception -- we can get online. Our Optus plan allows for 6G usage a month at about 75 bucks but, go beyond that, and they come for your children.

Last month, we went to iTunes and rented the movie "Lust, Caution." First, it took 14 hours to download. Although we enjoyed the film's dark artistry, it wasn't worth a $280 rental. Yep, the monthly bill came in and it was about $355 total.

To Optus credit, they dismissed the excessive charge when I complained and threatened to send George W. Bush to Australia when he's done pillaging the U.S. But it was a "one-time-only forgiveness credit. " Oh, there won't be a second time.

On the plus side, there are there are tons of CD and DVD stores here, as it's too costly to download anything.

Welcome to 1989.

Wine & Food Festivals

A nice thing about autumn in Sydney are the fun wine & food festivals held many weekends, some right on the beach. All the regional vineyards have booths and there's also tres' yummy local food. Ziggy and I have taken full advantage and a nice feature is that you can sample the wines before shelling out for a full glass.

These festivals are quite popular and here's the view from the "Jazz & Shiraz" fest at Cronulla Beach. (It doesn't seem to rhyme until you've had a few wine samples...)

Tight Parking

As with all cities, Sydney has lots of traffic...and, like LA, getting rid of their once-excellent tram system didn't help.

You can see here how tight the parking can be...

Surry Hills Festival

Over the weekend, we checked out the Surry Hills Festival which is a day long food, beer and music fest in our local community, or council as they are called here. We thought it was going to be a little neighborhoody affair...which I guess it was, if 90,000 people live in your neighborhood.

Nonetheless, it was a pretty autumn Saturday afternoon in Prince Alfred Park where the fest took place. There was a dog parade, 6 music/performance stages, farm animals (where Ziggy first learned Shetland ponies don't ever get big), lots of booths selling what-nots, and tons-o-food. A beverage company was giving out free cans of energy drinks, so it was fun watching everyone in line at the port-o-lets, bouncing up and down, bladders full of Red Bull and Tooheys.

Interesting to see the contrasts between this festival and the street fairs in NYC. The fact that it took place in a big park was a plus, as was the emphasis on live acts, both music and theater, and some amusing fashion shows. Both fairs in Sydney and NYC seem to sell a lot of panties and socks. If it weren't for these fairs, we'd all be walking around barefoot and, well, you get the idea...

One of the more touching moments was when a 12-year-old kid won an air guitar contest. He came up to accept his prize and simply said "All o' you can fuck off!" His parents laughed, clapped and seemed so proud. Guess this is what Aussies mean when they celebrate being a Larrikin.

Attacked by Giant Koala at Sydney Zoo!

Mistaking my urbane metrosexual scent for eucalyptus, a rare female Giant Koala attacked me at the Sydney Zoo. These are normally shy creatures, except "when aroused by overwhelming levels of irresistible male scent...or simply hungry for human flesh," according to the surprisingly unsympathetic zookeeper, who said she didn't really care which of the 2 caused this attack. "Less Yanks the better," I swear I heard her mumble.

Luckily, the Giant Koala is toothless, so it was like being gummed by a large teething baby.

Later at the Zoo Pub I recovered with my friend Joey, who's been depressed lately.













OK, this picture isn't actually for April Fools Day, as it's real. Really.
Tree Kangaroo, Cutest Creature on Earth?